Motherhood is serious business—which is why it's so important to laugh about! Get your giggle on with 21 humorous—and wise—quotations about mama-ing.
1. Phyllis Diller
![a modern looking home]()
"I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them."
2. Lisa Alther
![an airport work guiding a plane]()
“Any mother could perform the jobs of several air-traffic controllers with ease.”
3. Buddy Hackett
![a young woman looking unhappy at her food]()
“My mother’s menu consisted of two choices: Take it or leave it.”
4. Florida Scott-Maxwell
![a woman giving her mom a shoulder massage]()
"No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement."
5. Erma Bombeck
![two women looking at a laptop screen]()
"When your mother asks, 'Do you want a piece of advice?' it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway."
6. Milton Berle
![a young woman doing some multitasking]()
“If evolution really works, how come mothers have only two hands?"
7. Roseanne Barr
![a woman meditating while her kids run around crazy]()
"I know how to do anything—I'm a mom."
8. Ambrose Bierce
![a mom holding her daughter on a chilly day]()
"Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly."
9. Chinese Proverb
![a young mom holding her baby's head against her own head]()
"There is only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it."
10. Peter De Vries
![a mom in a car with her kids]()
"A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car for ever after."
11. Calvin Trillin
![containers of food sitting in a fridge]()
“The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.”
12. Dorothy Parker
![a family pose together at their dining table]()
“The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.”
13. Dave Barry
![a young boy dribbling from his mouth]()
"If you were to open up a baby's head―and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should―you would find nothing but an enormous drool gland."
14. Leo J. Burke
![a young family lying in bed together]()
"People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one."
15. Vicki Lansky
![a young boy crawling away from his mom]()
"You will always be your child's favorite toy."
16. Erma Bombeck
![two young girls playing around]()
"When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out."
17. Tina Fey
![a young mom holding her baby while working on a laptop]()
"I had to get back to work. NBC has me under contract. The baby and I only have a verbal agreement.
18. Ed Asner
![a young mom multitasking]()
"Raising a kid is part joy and part guerilla warfare."
19. Author Unknown
![a mom looking distressed]()
"Working mothers are guinea pigs in a scientific experiment to show that sleep is not necessary to human life."
20. Jewish Proverb
![a mom checking on her sleeping daughter]()
"God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers."
21. Carrie Latet
![a woman holding her tiny baby's feet]()
"My mom is literally a part of me. You can't say that about many people except relatives, and organ donors.