Being the Best Birth BuddyBy Jill Caryl WeinerIf pregnancy were the NFL, then consider labor-and-delivery day theSuper Bowl, which means, expectant dads, your child’s birth will be one of the mostimportant events of your life, and your job is to be there for yourpartner so she'll be able to deliver a healthy baby her way—or as closeto her original plan as possible. Here's how:• Be her number-one fan. In interview after interview, women have said that whatmattered most during labor was their partners' support. So smile,cheer her on and help in whatever way she wants you to. If she needs you torub her back and murmur encouragement, do so. If she would like you torun interference with her doctor, be there.• During labor, play head coach and take charge. She can't manageeverything when she's focused on riding the waves of discomfort, soyou'll have to step in. If your wife wants pain medication, make surethe anesthesiologist is paged immediately. If morale dips, help herrefocus: Switch on the mp3 (if you brought one); move her to anotherchair or position (if she’s mobile); and tell her you love her and that thebaby’s coming soon.• Attend to her physical comfort. Give her a back or shoulder massage orapply ice- or heat-packs. Do whatever she needs to take the edge offcontractions, and be alert, because her needs will change quickly. Oneminute she’ll want a massage, the next she won’t want to be touched.• Ignore the trash talk. Your partner could get cantankerous—pain willdo that to anyone. Try not to take it personally and pull back. What’s saidin the delivery room stays in the delivery room.• Bring the right equipment. Besides her packing list and her written birth plan, remember to bring for yourself comfortable shoes, a change of clothes, deodorant, toothbrush and breath mints. Remember: You're in for the long haul.• Fuel up. Bring snacks because you'll get hungry, too. But besensitive: Because of hospital policy, she may not have been able to eatall this time and may not react too kindly to seeing you chow down. If you’ve had a garlicky sandwich or a strong cup of coffee, pop abreath mint afterward.• Be open to calling back-up from the bench. Some expectant fathers are justnot comfortable in the role of support person. It’s okay if she relies on abest friend, mother, sister or a doula (a professional trained to offeremotional and physical support during pregnancy). Having that backup cangive you the confidence to be supportive in your own way.The bottom line: “No one knows her better than you; no one loves herbetter than you," says Penny Simkin, doula and author of "The BirthPartner." ”Your continuous presence is one of the most important thingsduring labor and delivery.”